Hi… my name is Rachel and I’ve got a big issue.
I am pregnant. I am 16 years old and I’m worried. It’s all I can think about, I’m having a hard time sleeping and I can’t find anyone to help. I’m afraid to tell my parents and I don’t trust the school counselor. I don’t know where to turn.
My boyfriend is really cool and everything… but he can be very pushy and kind of demanding. I know he, like really, loves me and everything, but it seems he wants me to prove my love for him. It’s, like an expected thing. And, like all my girl friends are talking about their “real” boyfriends.
Nothing was really ever said, but I felt the pressure. It was pressure from my boyfriend, and pressure from the girls I hung out with. I was very reluctant and just did not want to deal with it. But, the idea of losing him was too much for me to bear.
Well, I guess I just caved in. Things happened so fast and I didn’t know what to expect. Now it’s all over, and I’ve got a problem. And, my boyfriend just doesn’t seem to be as interested in me anymore. He doesn’t want any part of my “problem.” I can’t get him to talk about it, and he won’t even look me in the eyes any more.
My girlfriends tell me to dump him and just get an abortion. Get rid of the problem and move on. But, it seems like more than just a “problem,” it’s a fetus, or baby, or my child, or whatever! I feel so alone because none of my friends want to help and my boyfriend just doesn’t even care!
It seems to me that I only have two choices now… to have my baby or to have an abortion.
I know abortion is legal. The people at Planned Parenthood seemed to be very businesslike and that abortion is an everyday, “matter of fact” procedure. It is no big deal and it they hundreds of them without any problem. It is “in and out” in one day and there is nothing to it. It is just a procedure that is done all the time.
But, deep down in my heart, I keep thinking that it’s wrong. Sure, it is just a piece of tissue that can be removed by a procedure at the Planned Parenthood clinic. But I know that, if it continues to develop, that “piece of tissue” can grow into only one thing; a child, my baby.
My mind is going through so many changes … so many thoughts!
What’s it like to be a mother?
Am I ready to handle it?
Wouldn’t it be great to have my own baby?
Where would I get the money to support my baby?
Would I have to quit school?
How could I tell my parents?
Would my boyfriend stand behind me and help?
Could I live with the guilt of having an abortion?
What are the risks of having an abortion?
Why do they cost so much?
Would it hurt?
How long do I have to make the choice?
Who can I turn to for help?
I feel ashamed, nervous, anxious, worried and depressed. At the same time, I am excited about the new life within me. The idea of giving birth to my own child, holding it, watching it grow and taking care of my child seems really cool.
What should I do?